Wednesday, April 8, 2009

All we need to do is bowl our average

Fresh off the "B" squad's impressive victory the week before, Los Diablos had its #1 and #2 bowlers back and was armed with the news all we needed to do was pick up 3 points tonight and we would be in the playoffs. Couple that with the fact that it was Pat's birthday, everything seemed to be lined up just right, almost the exact opposite of the week before when all odds were stacked against us.

As happens so often in sports, when presented with the opportunity to cease the moment, an individual or a team feels the pressure. The anchor around the neck, the hand against the throat, the quivering knees, the puckering sphincter...we all know the signs all too well. If we bowl our average or better, we have a very good chance of taking the majority of the points. Last week's glorious 2445 series (815 average) was replaced by this week's 2290 (763 average). Altough we win and lose together as a team, it must be pointed out that Pat (519), Brian (466) and Matt (435) all bowled above average.

While Dan has abandoned the "it doesn't matter what I do I still bowl 160 (158)" attitude, his ill advised late season delivery adjustment seems to be poorly timed. Dan did start out in game one earning the Diablos' 1st burrito of the season (followed by Muck and Pat) on the way to a solid 178. This solid start was aborted abruptly when birthday boy Pat, with his left hand on his hip and his right hand limply moving up and down with his index finger pointing at Dan's chest, screeched: "You BITCH!!" This disturbing outburst by his younger brother appeared to have done serious psychological damage and the 178 was followed by an impotent effort of 124 and 136 for a series of 438.

Speaking of puckering sphincters.....Jim seemed much more focused on clenching his butt cheeks together than following through on his delivery. Although we all would have liked to see some better scores, we can be thankful Jim spared us a lifetime's worth of nightmares had we witnessed a back swing bowel blowout. When it became clear to Jim that he would not break a 450 series, a little of the old Jim came to life as he declared he had never been below 450 all season. Jim was correct, tonight's 432 (155, 124, 153) was indeed his lowest. Week ten's 457 (155, 154, 148) was his previous low. Looks like a 1st game 155 is a bad omen for Jim.

Next week we start all over again boys. Let's get back on track.

Thursday, April 2, 2009

"B" squad my ASS

What would we do without our rocks, our strength, the number 1 and 2 bowlers on the team? Who would lead us on the trash talking and the "get your head out of your #@%" comments? Despite the gloomy forecast and the prospect of an 0-7 evening, Los Diablos showed up on Tuesday night. How would we put our 776 average up against Hank and the Any Old Strikes' 994 average? With Brian in the familiar lead off spot (no place for headcases tonight), Dan in the anchor spot and JD solidly in the middle, we filled inthe roster with a late arriving Todd and Super Sub 100. The question was in everyone's minds....would Scott break 100 in more than one game this week or would he truly take over as King headcase?

Not only did Scott break 100, his 485 series (175, 181, 129) was 178 pins over last week!! Brian's 520 (163, 213, 144) was followed by Dan 's 503(192, 163, 148), JD's 490 (186, 162, 142) and Todd's 447 (174,128, 145). No need to do the math, that was a whopping 890 in the 1st game, only 12 below our all time best. Needless to say we did an ass whippin' and won by 153 pins. Game 2 saw a slight drop to an 847 but another 2 points nonetheless. This margin was a mere 84 pins. Could we possibly win all 7 or would Hank's corkscrew, annoying style finally get the better of us? We did dip to a sub par 708 in game 3 yet it was good for another 41 pin victory and a 7-0 sweep. Los Diablos was on fire and we tied our all time high handicap series with a 3555. This performance by a "subpar" lineup got the talk going about who truly deserves to be in the starting five and begs the question.......can you afford to miss a week?

As we all say and know all too well, it sure feels better to be taking 5 or 7 points a night verse getting only 1 or 2. Let's keep it rolling.

PS. A couple worthy notes. During his 175 game, Scott earned the right to buy shots and Brian started out game 2 with 5 straight strikes.